It's completely unfair. I tried to bring back the 90s ages ago. And what did I get? Glares. Very uncomfortable giggles and just overall judgement. Then what do I see? A clearly trendy girl rockin the Blossom look; patterned floral dress, jean jacket and some raybans. What! This was my decade to bring back. I was going to single-handedly bring back the grunginess, the jean jackets, the over-all fuck you corporate America of the best part of the 90s. Sadly, I was too late. I thought it was too early to try to bring the 90s back, I guess I was clearly mistaken.
Now it's the trendy kids who have made it ok to wear ripped jeans, flannel, and converse all over again. I feel too ashamed to engage. My dream slobster uniform has been commandeered and I am relegated to wearing shoes without holes. I curse the hipsters who took the 90s from me. Wearing the Jem T-shirts, and the names of bands they weren't even old enough to listen to until just now. This was my childhood. And now they are displaying it across their chest for all the world to see.
If any one of them dares to wear a Breaker High T-shirt. They are going down. So enjoy your floral prints now hipsters. It's only a matter of time before it becomes too commercialized and the golden age of the 90s is cast aside like every decade before it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
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